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(In 1996, thanks to the Freedom of Information Act, 201 more hours of previously unreleased Watergate tapes were made available to the public. Stanley Kutler, the editor of "Abuse of Power: The New Nixon Oval Office Tapes," did an admirable job of transcribing the tapes and putting them in a proper historical context. However, he was unable to include all of the tapes in his book. What follows are excerpts from a few of the tapes left out of Kutler's book, with each recording dated and those in attendance so noted.) APRIL 22, 1973: THE PRESIDENT, H.R. "BOB" HALDEMAN, AND HENRY KISSINGER, 9:50--10:50 A.M., OVAL OFFICE.
KISSINGER: I'm right here, Mr. President. PRESIDENT NIXON: Oh...uh, Henry, good, I'm glad you're here...I want you to get down on your knees, Henry, and pray for me...I'm up shit creek without a paddle. I've got the damn Jew press on me like a "kick me" sign taped to my ass. KISSINGER: Of course, Mr. President. HALDEMAN: You can kneel over here, Henry. PRESIDENT NIXON: Never mind that...just get me some support from those sons-of-bitches in the cabinet. Tell them I've got stuff on them...pictures. KISSINGER: But, Mr. President, you have these things? PRESIDENT NIXON: We've got tons of stuff...tons... KISSINGER: All right, Mr. President, but it would help me if I could...see the pictures. HALDEMAN: We'll get some for you, Henry. KISSINGER: Good. Now, sir, I want to discuss the latest operation in Camb—(cuts off)
APRIL 23, 1973: THE PRESIDENT, HALDEMAN, AND JOHN EHRLICHMAN, 11:20--11:45 A.M., EXECUTIVE OFFICE BUILDING.
HALDEMAN: He knows, and he wants... PRESIDENT NIXON: How much? HALDEMAN: He wants...one million. PRESIDENT NIXON: One million? The cocksucker! What's he going to do with a million dollars—buy himself an island? (He laughs.) EHRLICHMAN: Yeah, Cuba. HALDEMAN: He's probably the only one who could take Castro out. PRESIDENT NIXON: Is he a Jew? EHRLICHMAN: Who? Desi Arnaz? No. HALDEMAN: What about his ex-wife? PRESIDENT NIXON: I hear she's all tied up with her show...it's awful. EHRLICHMAN: What's awful? HALDEMAN: Her show. EHRLICHMAN: It is? The new one? HALDEMAN: Yeah. PRESIDENT NIXON: "The Lucy Show." They'll cancel the goddamned thing. HALDEMAN: They changed the name—now it's "Here's Lucy." PRESIDENT NIXON: Big deal. EHRLICHMAN: They won't dump her. PRESIDENT NIXON: They'll cancel her ass. Just like we'll cancel that bastard—(cuts off)
APRIL 24, 1973: THE PRESIDENT, HALDEMAN, EHRLICHMAN, AND MATT NEUMAN, 10:15--10:45 A.M., OVAL OFFICE.
NEUMAN: 1998. PRESIDENT NIXON: 1998? Jesus Christ, that's twenty-five years from now, goddammit. So...you know about...this thing? NEUMAN: You mean Watergate? PRESIDENT NIXON: Yeah. What happens...to me? NEUMAN: You really want to know? PRESIDENT NIXON: Yes—of course! NEUMAN: Well, early next year you'll be threatened with impeachment... PRESIDENT NIXON: I knew it! The sons-of-bitches! Yes? Go on? And then what? NEUMAN: ...but you'll survive a big vote in the senate—and successfully serve out your second term. PRESIDENT NIXON: (greatly relieved) Ah! Good...you hear that, boys? NEUMAN: But, in time, the public will turn on you, they'll discover the tapes— PRESIDENT NIXON: The tapes! Oh no... NEUMAN: ...and, in 1981 you'll be indicted by a federal grand jury.... PRESIDENT NIXON: What? NEUMAN: ...and convicted— PRESIDENT NIXON: No! NEUMAN: You'll flee, but you'll be caught....an angry mob will chase you down and shoot you in the back, and parade your lifeless body around in the streets. A lot like Mussolini. PRESIDENT NIXON: ...(shocked) I can't believe it! EHRLICHMAN: ...(very solemn) It can't be true. HALDEMAN: (horrified) No, no...that's horrible, horrible. NEUMAN: Just kidding!...(they all laugh) PRESIDENT NIXON: Hey, settle a little bet. NEUMAN: Sure. PRESIDENT NIXON: When will they cancel "The Lucy Show?" HALDEMAN: "Here's Lucy." PRESIDENT NIXON: (annoyed)...All right, "Here's Lucy." When are they gonna cancel that thing? NEUMAN: "Here's Lucy?" PRESIDENT NIXON: Not "I Love Lucy," but the one after she and Arnaz split up. HALDEMAN: The one where she has a son and a daughter. EHRLICHMAN: And she works in a bank. PRESIDENT NIXON: And Gale Gordon's her boss...Mr. Mooney. HALDEMAN: It was in color. NEUMAN: When was it on? What years? EHRLICHMAN: It's on now. NEUMAN: Oh, well, I hardly ever watched TV in the early seventies—I guess I was too busy trying to drive you out of office. PRESIDENT NIXON: A wiseguy. I've had about enough of you, you're no help...Send in that other guy from the future...(cuts off)
APRIL 24, 1973: THE PRESIDENT, HALDEMAN, EHRLICHMAN, AND SEYMOUR CYBORGER II, 10:50--11:15 A.M., OVAL OFFICE.
PRESIDENT NIXON: Greetings from the Twentieth Century. CYBORGER II: Thank you. PRESIDENT NIXON: Listen, Cyborger, I'll get right to the point: I need your help. I need you to tell me a few things about the future. Now, I'm not gonna ask you to, uh, change history or anything—just fill me in on a few facts. CYBORGER II: I will try, Mr. American Twentieth Century President. PRESIDENT NIXON: Good. CYBORGER II: But I am unable to do anything immoral, or false. PRESIDENT NIXON: Oh, I understand—perfectly. HALDEMAN: In what future administration did you say you served?—or should I say will serve? CYBORGER II: The Simpson Administration. PRESIDENT NIXON: Simpson? CYBORGER II: Yes. President O.J. Simpson. The sixty-first President of the United States. PRESIDENT NIXON: The football player? Hell, he's a great running back, but I never would have thought— CYBORGER II: He will become only the second write-in candidate to win the American presidency in the Twenty-first Century. PRESIDENT NIXON: The second?! Who was the first? CYBORGER II: President Neuman. HALDEMAN: Neuman? PRESIDENT NIXON: Hey, wait, I smell a rat... EHRLICHMAN: Aren't you... CYBORGER II: I must be going... HALDEMAN: It's him!
PRESIDENT NIXON: Stop him! Stop—(cuts off)
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